Reasons You Need To Be Close Friends With Your Local Mamaput Seller in FUTA

1. When there's a long line of people, she'll answer you sharp sharp.

She'll be like, "Ah! My customer/son/daughter! Bring your plate let me sell for you." and just like that, you have your food on time. Sure all the people on the line will loudly swear for you but who cares? Swear no dey catch Nigerian man.

2. You can buy food on credit if you ever need to and she'll be cool with it because you're so close.

She can even let you eat free sef.

3. She can dash you free meat or pomo if she's in a really good mood.

Imagine it. Not just free meat oh. Bottle water, soft drinks. Magical things happen when you're friends with Iya Basira.

4. If she ever decides to poison all her customers because she's gotten enough money to move to China and start a new life, she'll probably warn you in advance.

5. If she ever decides to "wash put", it won't change anything for you because you already like her!


6. Any amount of food you buy will be plenty.

She'll be like, "You're N50 rice? Give him N200 own."

7. Depending on how close you two are, you can even organize home delivery service.

If you live close by, she can send one of her sellers to bring your food to you.

8. When she eventually decides to destroy everybody's destinies with jazz, she'll probably warn you. Probably.

You can't tell me this hasn't crossed your mind at some point.